Trusted contact in a Reminder: what it means for you

The three Reminder tabs

The Reminders page has three tabs. Created by me gathers the routines you scheduled. For me holds those others created for you and you accepted. Trusted lists the Reminders in which someone named you as a contact to alert.

Every Reminder therefore involves three roles: the creator, the person who receives it and replies, and the trusted contacts who are alerted. A typical example: a daughter creates an evening Reminder for her mother who lives alone, the mother replies each evening, and her brother and a neighbour are trusted contacts.

When you are alerted

When the Reminder runs, the person receiving it sees two actions: I am OK or I need help. If they choose I need help or do not reply within the allotted time, the alert contacts configured for that Reminder can be notified. The creator always remains among the recipients.

The person can postpone the Reminder by a few minutes, but the option disappears as the deadline approaches, so the reply never slips past the allotted time. A missed-response alert therefore comes at the end of that window, not with every postponement. Location is included only if the person chooses to share it.

What you see and what you cannot change

In the Trusted tab you can open each Reminder and see who it is for, who created it and when it runs. It tells you in advance for which people you might receive an alert, so a notification at nine in the evening does not take you by surprise.

You cannot, however, edit times, title or contacts, or pause or disable the Reminder, because you are neither its creator nor its recipient. If you think a time does not work, for example because you are at work then, talk to the person who created it.

Why the person knows you are there

Before accepting a Reminder, the invited person sees by name who will be alerted: the creator and the chosen alert contacts, even if some are not in their own circle. Your name is not hidden: it is part of what they agreed to.

This transparency protects you too. The person receiving the Reminder knows you might call or drop by if they do not reply, and can tell you in advance if they prefer another approach. To set up that conversation well, see how to ask consent for a family reminder.

How to remove yourself from a Reminder

If you can no longer be there, for example because you are moving, working nights or cannot react in time, you can remove yourself. In the Trusted tab, tap the trash icon on the Reminder’s card, or open the detail page and remove yourself there.

Removing yourself does not delete the Reminder: it stays active for the other people. Tell the creator before you leave. After approval, contacts cannot be added or replaced, only removed: if you leave, that Reminder’s network gets smaller and nobody takes your place automatically.

Who can remove whom

In the Reminder detail, the creator and the person receiving it can remove any trusted contact. A trusted contact can remove only themselves. The creator always remains a required recipient and can never be removed.

If someone removed you, it is not necessarily a sign of conflict: the person receiving the Reminder may reduce who is alerted about them, and that is their choice. To add a contact after approval, the creator has to prepare a new Reminder, which the person must accept again.

What to do when an alert arrives

A missed-response alert is not a diagnosis: the person may be asleep, out or have a flat phone. A help alert, on the other hand, asks you to act. Agree beforehand who calls first, who goes in person and after how long, so that two trusted contacts do not each wait for the other to move.

If you cannot reach them and fear immediate danger, call the local emergency number. For a step-by-step protocol, see what to do when an older parent does not reply.

Frequently asked questions